Opinions

The other day I had lunch with someone I would consider a friend. The conversation knowingly steered to all of my personal "woes" right now as they are many. It seems as though the storm is raging on every front.

I considered the conversation to be one of safety as my friend had been previously very understanding of my troubles. He even said that it wasn't his place to judge, which I would naturally take issue with, but then he voiced his opinion.

He became almost angry and aggressive at stating his displeasure of my actions. Reiterating many times that it wasn't his place to judge me, because his opinion didn't really matter. When I pressed him on the issue, he said that my mind was already made up, which was why his opinion didn't matter.

I am not opposed to someone judging me, as I cannot see myself clearly at times. I think it is of necessity that we bring others into our world to help us from becoming fruity.

But as I listened to my friend's assessment of my situation, based upon the 2 minute condensed summary of the past 3 months, I felt sick to my stomach. I felt the need to defend myself, but decided against it. The reason being, that it was already a lost case. My friend, although he claimed to be an unbiased listener, proved not to be so.

I felt his judgment despicable. Why? Not because he was wrong per se, but rather because he had failed to execute due diligence before passing judgment. He had made assumptions of my situation without even bothering to ask me if they were true. He had determined me guilty without honestly examining the facts.

I felt his judgment despicable, because I sat there and suffered the brunt of his attack, I felt as if I was looking into a mirror. How many times have I judged other the same way? How many times have I passed judgment on friends and family without even being willing to help bear their burden. My self-righteousness began to stink, and I vowed then and there to be more compassionate to others.

My opinion is simply that. An opinion. Opinions are not necessarily based on truth. That is why we love opinions in this country, because they are the quick way out. We don't have to get involved. We don't have to get our own hands dirty. We can simply stand at a distance and give our opinion on a situation or worse yet a life!

Once our opinion is rendered we rarely if ever follow up with those who are in need of restoration. After all, wasn't our job just to deliver the message?

All of this talk about opinions, maybe we should take a moment to stop and define what the word actually means? The dictionary says this:

Main Entry: opin·ion

Pronunciation: \ə-ˈpin-yən\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Latin opinion-, opinio, from opinari
Date: 14th century
1 a: a view, judgment, or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter b: approval, esteem
2 a: belief stronger than impression and less strong than positive knowledge b: a generally held view
3 a: a formal expression of judgment or advice by an expert b: the formal expression (as by a judge, court, or referee) of the legal reasons and principles upon which a legal decision is based

Look closely at the second definition. A belief not as strong as positive knowledge. Is that not what my friend offered me? His belief? His belief, but not necessarily positive knowledge?

Is that not what we offer others every time we give our opinion? Isn't that what we generally hold people accountable to - our opinion of them?

Brothers and sisters this ought not to be so! The very idea of judging someone this way has become despicable to me!

God forgive me for the times that I have judged others in this manner. Fill me with your grace and mercy that I might look on others with Your eyes of compassion!

John 7:24 - Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment.”